Confessions of a screwed up middle aged man: Pettiness


It is something that still surprises me. Seeing someone act and behave with petty i.e. immature behavior. I see more and more as I age why Jesus clearly showed how corrupt the natural state of humanity is. I lived in the south most my life. Now I am not saying that there is not petty immature people in the south, by mentioning this point. Why I mention it is that it has allowed me to gain an insight into behavior I may not have noticed living my entire life where I now live.
I also think it is due to my salvation that I can see things in a different light, or a better phrasing would be with the light of God shown upon those about me. I have had a very diverse image upon life that not all can say they have had so that too helps me look at things in this light of Christ as many may not or purposely turn their heads away from.
At this time, I am going through a little bit of bumpy road at work. The one at its center, well other than me, is one of my bosses. It is a large enough company that there are bosses over bosses. Well as I look upon the issue I start to understand what is going on, and so all I think I can do is do what I am supposed to do as is taught by Christ. As I type this, the realization hits me, just so you understand where I am coming from.
I need to pray for this man as well as another of the bosses. They suffer from the ideal that since they are management that everything must be done in such a way and in such a manner that it gives them the feeling of control of the situation. I wish I could go into more detail, but let us just say that each day is different from the previous one or the one that is to come, well at least in the area I work in. It is an area that is demanding. I had raised to the next level recently having become bored with the “regular” challenges and sought after some that would actually make me think.
The thing is they sent me on a shift that had no other peers equal to that new level to discuss issues with to gain their insight. Not anyone who says you can go straight into a job without someone to help you out at first is not telling you the truth; they are also lying to themselves. I can go no further other than to say that this one boss did not like that I acted in a certain way. To his satisfaction, even though the reason for my actions goes back to them not providing me with something I requested from them several times that night.
As I stated though this person does not see it this way, nor does he wish to see the truth, for it would shatter his illusionary world of power and control. Have I grown from it? I would say yes. Has he? I would say no. Thus the need to pray for him. For it is his soul that is in need of the help not mine.
It was stated best in the movie “Angel and the Badman” with John Wayne, when dealing with his future wife. She was a Quaker; their outlook on faith is one that I think all should have. When someone seeks to do harm to you it. You may suffer some injury, you may even die, but it is not you that is ultimately being hurt. It is them they are hurting.
Our reward is not promised on this earth but in the eternal life that is to come beyond this temporal life, we now live. How we live this life though is a determining fact upon our reward in the eternal. When you seek to do harm to another through violence or simply removing them from a job because you do not like them it is your reward you are taking from yourself. Each action of hate, each word said in anger. Each act that causes harm to someone else ultimately lies at your doorstep. It is something you must answer for before God. Many who now think themselves Christian will be stunned to find themselves standing before God on the days of the Great White Throne Judgment. They had thought they would be among the counted but instead find themselves being judged to see if they are worthy of being welcome to live an eternal life free to serve the Creator of the Universe within and throughout His creation. All that stand before Him will weep and plead, but what they do not fully understand is even though God will be the one that ultimately says if they are welcome. Their own actions and behavior are their judge. For we are given the Bible to teach us what is right and wrong and if we do not follow these rules even though we may have been saved we will find that we can be removed from Jesus and thus from God Himself.

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