Confessions of a screwed up middle aged man: The case of the “unmarried.”


In one of the groups I belong to on Facebook. One of the other members wrote a post about once you are divorced you can never remarry. He went to the point of stating that if someone remarries, not only the couple doing so, but the clergymen preforming the service are, per him, blaspheming against God.
I was led to 1 Corinthians 7 to address this issue. Here it is laid out by the requirements for marriage.
6 – But I speak this by permission, and not of commandment. 7 For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that. 8 I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I. 9 But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.
I must add that the verses encapsulated within this chapter deal with several aspects of not only marriage, but of natural sexual behavior as it has to do with the teachings of the Bible and Jesus Christ.
What must be established is first being chased. We are to remain virgins till marriage. If we never marry we are to remain this way.
Now as is pointed out in verse eight, the need to avoid sin comes into play. The person that wrote the posting in Facebook took the word “unmarried” to mean single. By his meaning, that they never have been married. However let’s look at how this verse is presented by Paul, who was celibate. His admonition in verse seven makes this clear. His desire is that all seek to achieve this end, but he realizes that there is temptation for those that have experienced natural sexuality with a spouse. So those that have lost their spouse due to death, which leaves them widowed, or divorced in many cases. Have a memory due to the natural desire to reproduce our species, of an act that if done out of wedlock is seen as a sin by God.
So let’s examine the word “unmarried”
Unmarried is “agamos” in the Greek and is defined as: “unmarried, of a person not in a state of wedlock, whether he or she has formerly been married or not.”
This is fortified by the way it is used in 7:11
“And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: 11 But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.”
Any who find themselves not married even after being married are seen as “unmarried.” So why give reference to the “widowed.” For one, they had their spouses removed from them without their consent. It also shows that those that have divorced fit within the verse as well.
So we come to verse nine:
“But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.”
Contain – egkrateuomai – properly, to exercise self control – literally “exercising dominion, from within.”
So as can be seen here it shows that if we cannot maintain self-control to remain chased then we are allowed to marry to prevent falling into sin and thus damnation.

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