wife

Confessions of a screwed up middle aged man: the right one


I must admit for those that have been following me for some time that I have been married three times. Now those that are not familiar with the teachings of the Bible and about marriage and sin. We are given the instruction that if we divorce God would prefer we never remarry. However if we are tempted to enter into sin through the lack of physical relations due to the removal of the spouse, then we are instructed to remarry. So this argument that someone has been married a lot and so they are not a true “Christian,” is a red herring and a diversion from the truth. Enough soapboxing. Why this post?
Well as I said I have been married three times. In this last situation both my wife and I had given up on ever finding happiness within a married relationship. Yet we both were on Christian Mingle for years, and never encountered each others profiles. We were both miserable and had decided that was how it was to remain. We both said to God if it is Your will for us to be with someone You Lord will have to guide us to them. That is what precisely what happened. In a few days we will have been with each other for two years.
Two years that have given me a new insight into life. A look at how marriage was supposed to be for everyone. Coupled and joined by God.
My wife is my best friend and fun to be with. Time away from her is time we both feel is wasted, but it is necessary for how the world is now designed to function. Do we argue? Yes. Do we hurt each other’s feelings? Time to time, yes again.
Still I cannot picture my life without her a part of it. A life we both know and acknowledge will last not just in this temporal existence, but into the eternal life that is to come that is promised us by Jesus Christ.
This I can say without reservation. If I had met her a day sooner or even before that we would not have made it. For us both acknowledge that it took the trials and tribulations that God has had us journey through to know who it is we are to be with. We know that we are the right one for each other.
I love you my wife. Now and forever.

Confessions of a screwed up middle-aged man: God’s time


This is a snapshot into my life.
We are told in the Bible that the man is to leave his father and mother and cleave unto the woman that becomes his wife making one entity.
Well at the age of 20 I did that and for nearly 13 years through growing up and finding God the man I had become was not acceptable to the woman that I had married. So she cast me aside even though I knew she was the one woman that was I meant to be with me forever.
For ten years I waited for her to return. Even after she remarried, I waited. Striving to follow the teaching of God.
Then toward the end of this decade I did what I was not supposed to do. First my faith waivered, second I placed too much emphasis on me doing God’s work and less on letting God do God’s work.
As a result I met another woman and married. It was not till near the end of the 9th year of marriage to this one that I came to find that I had been lied too, deceived. The woman I thought I had married did not exist. Instead the woman I was married to brought into my life destruction and chaos and destitution. Soon after I entered into my year of Job and kept the promises I had made to her and myself if she did not correct her ways. As a result I was divorced for the second time.
I had returned to my correct place with where I should be with God, yet different. I was in a different city. I was a different man. So God knowing this set me upon a new path. A path that would allow me to serve Him and allow me to reach out to more people then I have ever envisioned myself reaching. Do they listen or ignore me I do not know, but many have read my words and still a seed is planted that may or may not grow.
As I followed God, I let Him lead me. Well, He led me to another woman. A woman I did not know could ever exist.
We share so much in common, yet there are still differences that make it interesting and exciting to be with her. I can say she is truly “God sent.”
Due to my believe and love for God I knew that my human desires would interfere with my walk with God, and God has made a provision just for this. He states that if you divorce and you cannot stay single He would rather us remarry then to live in sin. But I also must add that when you serve God He will reward you if you are truly serving me.
As a result yesterday I married for the third and last time. For she is truly the woman I am meant to live with for all eternity. I know that it stated until death, but when you truly understand God there is no death except that caused by sin. If you live for God and you serve God you will do so for all eternity and so you will do that with a companion because we are told we are not meant to be alone. My companion is my new wife and it is she that has now truly replaced my first wife and for that I will love her forever with only God being more important. For the person I was at twenty is not the man I am today. We are two different people, even though I have always been this person that now types these words. The person then was a child of sin and the man I am now is a child of God.